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I broke the StairMuther tonight!

Discussion in 'Food & Drink Forum' started by Fred, Apr 7, 2003.

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  1. Apr 7, 2003 at 9:04 PM #1
    Fred

    Fred .........

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    My leg is finally healed, dad is safe and sound at home, I have a stable day shift job.... it seems my life is calming down. So, it's time to hit the gym again. I have porked up a pound or two this winter and am bound and determined to get it off. I have been eating much healthier and the next step is getting back on the StairMuther.

    The StairMuther and I have a long history of a love-hate relationship. About 10 years ago, I decided to get back in my 32's which meant I had to drop 30 pounds. So, 5 days a week, I hit the StairMuther. The bitch laughed at me when I walked in. It has eyes in. If you look hard enough, you can see them. Every one of those damn machines are possessed. I ate normal, just went religiously and visited the StairMuther. I lost my 30 pounds in 4 months and got back in my 32's (only to be told I looked like a concentration camp survivor!)

    Anyway..... I walk in today all pumped up, hop on, put in my correct weight and start riding her like the bitch she is! I was 12 minutes in to and was sweating like a whore in church thinking about the 2nd coming and then it happened! SNAP! The frickin' cable to the right leg broke- snapped clean in two! It threw me backwards and I bumped into a fat lady on the tread mill behind me. Everyone stops and turns around. I bet I was 14 shades of red. The girl comes out and asks if I am hurt. I told her "yeah, my pride!" :(
     
  2. Apr 7, 2003 at 9:13 PM #2
    WilliamJ

    WilliamJ SUPERMOD

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    i hate i didn't see that.
     
  3. Apr 7, 2003 at 9:40 PM #3
    builder

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    twice.
     
  4. Apr 7, 2003 at 10:04 PM #4
    sadic1

    sadic1 Full Access Member

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    And I thought it was the orgasm I gave my wife that made the ground shake today. Turns out it was just a fat homo hitting the floor a hundred fifty miles away...
     
  5. Apr 7, 2003 at 10:06 PM #5
    DaveW

    DaveW Super Moderator

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    ...i just blew snot bubbles
     
  6. Apr 7, 2003 at 10:06 PM #6
    builder

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    this gives me wood.
     
  7. Apr 7, 2003 at 10:35 PM #7
    Daisey

    Daisey AKA Dayse :)

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    I simply LOVE the way you tell a story Fred--I laugh out loud every time!!:laugher: :boune: :laugher:
     
    Last edited: Apr 7, 2003
  8. Apr 7, 2003 at 11:05 PM #8
    Fred

    Fred .........

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    Re: Re: I broke the StairMuther tonight!

    It wasn't a story sweetie. It was the truth. I'm sure that Vision's on Tunnel Rd in Asheville will have the broken cable will be in a display case by tomorrow morning. It's the most action that's happened to that place, outside the sauna, in years!
     
  9. Apr 7, 2003 at 11:11 PM #9
    Daisey

    Daisey AKA Dayse :)

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    Re: Re: Re: I broke the StairMuther tonight!

    Poor thing!--maybe no one will remember it was you!
     
  10. Apr 7, 2003 at 11:17 PM #10
    builder

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    Re: Re: Re: Re: I broke the StairMuther tonight!

    Sweetheart...you've never seen Fred. you can't forget a 6'3 queer like him when he lumbers into the room dragging his knuckles.
     
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