Honesty is the best policy . . .

My kids just asked me a question that relates to this. My wife's friend was getting a divorce a couple of years ago and her soon to be ex-husband called her up from his car, told her it was her fault he was doing it, and stayed on the phone with her while he blew his head off with a shotgun (2 days before Christmas, no less, the bastard). Her kids were 8, 5, and 2. When they asked what happened to their dad, she told them his heart gave out. Technically, that's not a lie I guess because his heart did stop, but of course it's a lie or witholding of the truth. In that case, most physchologists would say that the kids, especially the youngest ones, aren't at a stage of development where they can full appreciate that, and it would likely hurt them a lot more than help them to know the truth until they're older. My kids know about the situation and asked me if it was right for her to lie to her kids about that. I told them it was the right thing to do, provided that she plans on telling them the truth someday when they're in more of a position to understand it.

I think you can make the same argument regarding adults along the lines of what hasbeens said. It depends on the context, timing, intent, and the spirit of the person saying it. There are times when witholding the truth in favor of waiting for better timing or context is definitely the right thing to do and times when a lie is the best thing you can do, but you have to be very careful that whatever you're doing and saying is truly in the other person's best interest and not for your own convenience.

 

You got a Sly dung ash tray too, didn't you?

 

No, I don't think being honest is the same as telling the truth, but it's in the same family. I consider myself to be a very honest person, but when I go into a job interview do I tell them "I'm late sometimes, and I like to play on the internet."? - Nope.