Bill Lee

from an interview in today's Globe (he's written a new book):


Q: You're still playing, but how hard do you throw these days?

A: I never threw hard. I was like Mike Cuellar. I threw small cantaloupes or soft pieces of fruit that couldn't be hit out of the infield.


Q: Tell me about the book.

A: Well, Yankees fans won't like it. There are no pictures.


Q: Who are your literary heroes, the people who've influenced your writing?

A: John Steinbeck, probably, and Kerouac.


Q: Hunter Thompson?

A: Hunter was great. I wanted him to be my running mate when I ran for president in '88. People said, 'Why would you want him?' Because he knew more about vice than anybody in America.


Q: Did you ever take steroids?

A: Oh, yeah, I took anything they'd give me. They shot me up with stuff all the time just to get me back out there. I looked like a Frank Perdue chicken half the time.


Q: Should the implicated players' names have asterisks?

A: Nah, no one reads punctuation anymore.


Q: You watched the Yankees series in Hawaii. That must have been nice.

A: I got up, took a swim with the turtles at sunrise, moseyed over to Charles Laquidara's house, watched the ballgame, and then sat down and had a civilized meal. It was great.


Q: Do you ever see any of your old Yankee nemeses? Mickey Rivers? Graig Nettles?

A: Yeah, I saw Nettles recently. The guy couldn't get out of the chair. He looks like a duvet cover.

 

you gotta love the Spaceman