UNC fan's cry for winning

I have to sit back and laugh at this!

Originally posted by BWSmith, a UNC fan, on a Carolina message board (10/21/02)

10 reasons why UNC fans expect a top-10 FB program!

Has there ever been a fan base with a higher ego backed up by less results on the football field than North Carolina's? I'm bursting at the seams from eating humble pie every year since November 1997 (including last year). One would think that everyone else is as well. But I still see phrases floated around like "we were a top-10 program before we got ruined and we need to fix it" floated around way too often. Delusions of grandeur higher than the dunce cap of the bell tower have made dunces of all who think we are a simple coaching change or backup QB change away from a return to the Charlie Justice era. Here are TEN REASONS why many fans seem convinced that the FB program in Chapel Hill is a sleeping Nebraska with inept coaches and snakebitten players:

10) US News Rankings: Hey, we're a "PUBLIC IVY!" Michigan is also a public ivy and they win championships, right? Why not us? I think it was Darnell Dockett who once said that the primary concern of the blue-chip players was getting a quality diploma from a highly-accredited university. Fire Bunting!

9) NFL Pro Players: Hey, we have the 3rd most alumni in the NFL, which means that we've got the personnel on the field to do the job! It must be the coaches that are holding us back! Fire Bunting!!

8) John Bunting: Our head coach has a Superbowl championship ring. The NFL is like, way bigger than college, right? Bobby Bowden doesn't have a Superbowl championship ring. None of the other coaches in the ACC have a Superbowl championship ring. Therefore, Bunting must be the best coach in the whole conference, and we deserve to go to the BCS. We've got the coaches to do the job, so it must be the players holding us back! Fire..uh...somebody!!

7) Women's Soccer: Our women's soccer team is the greatest sports team of any sport that has ever existed, even going back to the Greek Olympics. None of that could possibly be due to Anson Dorrance, but rather it says something about the inherent genetic and environmental superiority of those who inhabit Chapel Hill over those who don't. That kind of superiority should be evident on the football field as well, right? Fire Baddour!

6) Ronald Curry: Ronald Curry was the greatest high school football player of all time, if not the greatest player at any level, right? Johnny Unitas couldn't hold high-school-Ronald's dirty socks, much less his jock strap. Just having had him on our team entitles us to some kind of shot at the championship game, right? Fire Nike!!

5) First State University: We're the frickin' FIRST STATE UNIVERSITY, right? So we've had a whole lot longer than say, Georgia, to comtemplate how to put together a winning football program. Florida State's only been around since what, the 1940s? What have we been doing all this time since 1793, playing grab-ass with some colonial Carolina wenches? Fire General Davie!!

4) Rabbit Waddell: Carl clocked the Rabbit as having a 40-time of 4.19. When you read all the recruiting reports on this board, you see lots of players with times in the 4.20s and 4.30s, but nobody runs a 4.19. Isn't that some kind of world record or something? Don't we deserve some kind of national championship of fast defensive backs? Shouldn't he be able to take the ball in for a touchdown before the opposition has even had a chance to notice that it's been snapped, kind of like the comic-book character "The Flash"? Fire Steve Kirschner for not mailing every AP voter a piece of paper with the number "4.19! Are you kidding me? You people sukk!" on it!!

3) Merchandise Sales: No matter where you go in the world, everyone is wearing Tar Heel merchandise. Don't believe me? Get on a plane and take a trip to the Kalahari desert in sub-Saharan Africa. Turn off the paved road. Then turn off the dirt road. Drive all the way out in the middle of that God-forsaken continent and check out those tongue-clicking Bushmen. They may not have ever interacted with the white man before, and they may be completely isolated from all civilization, but you'll notice that all of them are wearing those t-shirts that say "Duck Fook" in all Carolina blue. Now THAT's merchandise marketing. Why can't we get good players to come here if they're already wearing our stuff? Fire Johnny T-Shirt!

2) Tailback U: We're "Tailback (by God) University"! We've had more players than anyone run more than 1,000 yards in a season. Respect our authoritah!!! Sometimes, that even translated into an ACC championship, which is a really prestigious FB trophy that is almost the same as winning a national championship. If we'd won a few more BlueBonnet and Gator Bowls with those running backs, we'd be right there in Miami, Pasadena, New Orleans, or Tempe opening can after can of whoopass. What happened? Fire everybody who coached a 1,000-yard-RB team!

1) Basketball: See? We CAN be awesome in a revenue sport. Why not football? What's the difference? Both involve simply showing up, sitting to watch the win unfold, and then leaving. We just need to figure out who "Dean" is in the football universe and tell him to get his Kansan arse over here quick and straighten everything out for us. Based on the example set by the basketball program, the football program should be expected to 1) be invited to more postseason contests than anyone else, 2) go to the Final Four, er, BCS in years when Dook doesn't go (i.e. every year, right?), and 3) even win a championship three times every 50 years. Is that so difficult? Fire everybody everywhere!!! (GO HEELS!)

 

Was/Is that supposed to be a joke?

 

Bear, I think the guy was serious. Hard to be upbeat for a school who basketball & football teams have won a combined total of 5 games in the year 2002!

 

And you're on a Carolina message board because???

 

I wonder what ol' BWSmith is doing these days....

 

Probably trying to figure out why he would of posted something as stupid as this:

 

and this:

Sometimes, that even translated into an ACC championship, which is a really prestigious FB trophy that is almost the same as winning a national championship.

 

lol.

Yeah. Dude wasn't very bright. You can tell he knew nothing about UGA based on his previous statement. As far as the ACC champtionship statement, the dude was delusional.

 

I'm confused.

 

It's ok. The same folks that didn't get it 8 years ago, don't get it now.